Long distance is very challenging, in my opinion it is one of the most difficult things to bear if you are really in love with someone. Leaving someone behind temporarily is terribly painful, but loosing them permanently is devastating. Here is my advice from a guy's perspective on how to survive the distance when you're the one who has moved away.
First of all, your partner needs to be independent and have a life of their own. This might sound harsh, but it is very true. If your partner is not independent enough during the long distance, the only thing that is going to happen while you're away is that he or she is going to cling to you so much, that you will eventually lose your patience or the goals you left to accomplish. You need someone that will support you in your dreams and that will celebrate your success with you. Also, if your partner is not strong enough, he or she will eventually give up, and the time you spent trying to make the relationship work will feel wasted. You and your partner need to remember why you made the decision to stay together, and you both need to stand by that decision. Selfishness does not fit into the equation. Both of you need to be totally altruistic. Don't focus on yourself, but rather focus on your goals together, as best friends.
Another important thing to keep in mind is the future you both have together. If you're with someone just to feel less loneliness while you're away then you're not making the right decision. It's not fair to you or your partner to string them along just for your convenience. Long distance requires a lot of commitment and knowing that this temporary sacrifice will pay off eventually is the key goal on which you should both focus.
How well do you communicate with your partner? Communication is very important when it comes to long distance. You need to communicate even small details about your day so that you both feel connected to each others lives on an intimate level. Don't think that if you tell her (him) the little details, your are wrong. Sharing your little stories or adventures (as little as they might be) can be a life savior. Knowing that your partner has things to tell you and is willing to share all the experiences throughout the day is beautiful. Don't be shy, just call her (him) to tell her that the moon is shining as bright as her eyes that night, and you wanted to share that moment with her (him). Schedule phone "dates" regularly to stay in touch, and if you guys have a date but you're not able to make it for any reason, call her (him) to let her (him) know and reschedule. Just because your partner is not there physically with you does not mean that you have the right to miss a "date." These little acts of respect will show her (him) how much you love her.
Personally, long distance has been extremely fulfilling for me. It may sound weird coming from a guy, but it's true. I can say this because I have found the right person. I've gotten to know things that I wouldn't have known in other circumstances. I've seen how strong she is, how patient, and understanding; you don't really see this as quickly in a normal dating scenario. But the best feeling by far, is imagining when it is all over and you get to celebrate the success of beating the distance together, and trust me, if you pass this test, other things in life will feel very easy.
Go for it and fight the fight hand in hand!!!
A blog about surviving love in a long distance relationship - We discuss how to have a successful long distance relationship and answer individual questions. Post a comment with your question, and we will respond.
Welcome!!!!
Awww...Long Distance Love...There's the high of seeing each other after months of seperation and the low of saying goodbye in a crowded airport. It's difficult and lonely but still so much better than the alternative of breaking up. It's amazing what we are willing to go through for love!
This blog was created by my boyfriend and me to share what we've learned about long distance relationships. It's been 2 long years, but we've actually become closer. We wanted to pass on our story.
Feel free to read and comment on our posts. If you have any questions about your own long distance romance, post a comment and we will each respond with "his" and "her" advice!
This blog was created by my boyfriend and me to share what we've learned about long distance relationships. It's been 2 long years, but we've actually become closer. We wanted to pass on our story.
Feel free to read and comment on our posts. If you have any questions about your own long distance romance, post a comment and we will each respond with "his" and "her" advice!
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